Chapter 24

Subject: Maddy

Maddy woke up. Something was different. She rubbed her face and her hand was cold against her face. She looked around the room and saw that she was in a sort of hospital room. It was an unusual, though. There was no handle on the door an her bed was on a raised podium. Maddy sat up and found she’d been laying on a plastic backboard. She wasn’t connected to any tubes or wires and that seemed unusual for a hospital. Why was she even in here?

She remembered. She’d been killed. 

A flash of panic ran through her and she stood up at lightning speed, scanning the room for threats. There wasn’t anything. She took a step forward and heard a loud thunk as her foot came down against the floor. She looked down, expecting to see that she’d stepped on a metal food tray, but instead found that her legs weren’t her legs anymore. They were, prosthetics? Her hospital gown came down to her knees and she pulled it aside to look closer.

She sat down and felt the composite and metal. Panic rose and then subsided. Her left arm was prosthetic too, the whole thing from the shoulder down. She pressed against the metal in her prosthetic hand and could feel the pressure. She stood up and walked a circle around the bed. An uncanny feeling overcame her. A mix of every emotion at once. 

She walked into the bathroom and looked in the mirror, only to find someone else’s reflection. The new person didn’t have hair. It’s eye’s were white. It had something black and mechanical attached to the back of it’s neck, and it ran halfway down it’s spine. Maddy reached up to touch it, and saw the person in the reflection mirror her. It was her. 

Panic rose, settled, and anger took over. She smashed the glass and screamed. “WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO ME?” She screamed at no one and everyone. She wanted to cry, but she couldn’t. The anger was washed over by calm, then sadness, then calm. She felt like she was watching her emotions war with each other from somewhere else, like they were competing sports teams and she was a spectator. She held up her hands and looked at them, nothing made sense. 

Jim was in the room, behind her hands. She could sense him. She lowered her hands and snarled.

“Good morning, sleepyhead. It’s me, Jim, from space,” Jim said, smiling. He had a toothpick in his mouth and wore a loose uniform jacket. 

“What did you do to me?” Maddy asked, her voice fast and fierce. 

“I saved your life is what I did,” Jim said. Maddy leaned forward and felt something push against her chest. She felt her abdomen and something was wrong. Something was under her skin. She pulled her gown off and inspected herself, regretting destroying the mirror. Her muscles weren’t right, and her lower abdomen transitioned from flesh directly into some type flat composite plate. She wanted to cry but seemed physically incapable of doing it. 

"You know what your team is calling you now?” Jim asked. Her team, she thought back to the chaos, she’d seen most of them die. “They call you ‘Tideturner’, Maddy. I think that’s a pretty badass nickname.”

“How long has it been?” Maddy asked. “Who made it?”

“Well, it’s been about three weeks since you made it to the cybernetics lab. Technically, only three of your team members survived. The two in the IFV- I’m sorry. These nicknames are really something. Smoker, Gremlin, and Dad. They all made it. You and your boss, Chief, died. Actually, you killed your boss.” Jim told her. Maddy remembered when she’d punched him, she’d been enraged that he was taking up the gunner’s chair and not shooting the fucking gun. Her team was dying while his dumbass sat up there yelling. 

“For the record Maddy, I agree with your decision to murder his ass, but I doubt the marine corps would. It’s a good thing I’ve hired you on, huh?” Jim smiled again, a different smile. 

“I don’t understand what the fuck you’re talking about. Your cryptic bullshit and creepy fucking smile are the last thing I want right now. Just explain this,” Maddy pointed to her legs and to the thing on her neck. “Explain why my skin is wrong and why my eyes are like this,” Maddy pled.

“Well Turner, to put it bluntly, you died. One of those goddamn monsters out there ripped you in half when you were less than 10 meters from the door. I watched the whole thing. The suit we sent down and you were wearing managed to keep you technically alive long enough for us to figure out what to do about that, and we decided to bring you back from the brink. Give you an opportunity to become greater than you ever were,” Jim’s voice had a musical drawl and it made Maddy deeply uncomfortable. 

“I know enough to understand that this isn’t just prosthetics. You went way further than you had to,” Maddy thought about her eyes, inhuman now. Her reflection scared herself. “You didn’t ask me if I wanted this.” Overwhelming sadness rose, then subsided. Anger then calm then more anger. She closed her eyes, but she could still see Jim. He wasn’t in the room. He was talking to her from her mind. 

“You don’t think I got this far without losing bits of who I was, do you?” Jim asked. His pupils grew into spiraling swirls, then morphed into stars before stretching into a thin black line. “You’re post-human now Maddy. You’re the most dangerous thing on the planet. Far more deadly than even the Adversary, I promise you that.”

Maddy pressed her eyes, trying to get the vision of him out. He only grew closer. 

“You will truly be a Tide Turner. You will tip the scale of every battle you fight in. You are now a part of the most powerful combined arms weapon system that has every been developed. You will burn worlds, Maddy.”

“I didn’t ask for this, you didn’t ask me,” Maddy repeated. 

“You were dead Maddy. Would you rather still be dead? Would you rather Dad and Gremlin and Carney and Liselle get torn to pieces, or get eaten alive because you weren’t there to protect them?” Jim’s voice was intense. His face grew closer. Maddy could smell ginger on his breath. 

“The whole city outside is dead, Maddy. And if you want Liselle or any of the others to have a chance at escaping this hell, you need to embrace this. We’ve created a place for them off world Maddy, we worked around the clock to make the station in orbit a safe place for them.” Maddy perked up at Jim’s words. She opened her eyes and he blinked into reality across the room, sitting in a chair. 

“You mean to tell me there’s a way off world, right now?” Maddy asked. 

“There is,” Jim smiled again. His smile never, ever reached his eyes. His soul never smiled. “But we couldn’t figure out a way to get anyone there without doing what we’ve done to you.”

“What, exactly, did you do to me? What is this?” Maddy asked, holding out her arms. Neither of them belonged to her. 

“I told you, you’re post-human now. You’re faster, stronger, and tougher than any human that has ever lived. Some have called y’all the next step in human evolution. I don’t know if that’s true, exactly, but I do know that biology is no longer a hindrance to what mankind is capable of. I’ve seen it with my own eyes.” Jim pointed to his eyes, and the thin black lines snapped back into round pupils. “We will explain everything to you and you’ll have a chance to ask as many questions as you want. I know this is a lot to take in all at once. The situation outside is extreme, and your people need you. Right now though, your folks all know you’re awake and want to come in and talk to you. I’ll give y’all some privacy. Don’t forget to put your gown back on.” Jim winked, and disappeared.

Maddy looked down, realizing she’d been naked for nearly the whole conversation. She didn’t really feel naked anymore. Her body wasn’t a woman’s body anymore. She pulled on her gown and sat down, looking at the door. It suddenly burst open. 

Liselle came in, a huge smile on her face. Dad and Gremlin were right behind her. Gremlin was smiling, Dad was not. Maddy stood up to greet them and was shocked to see that she towered over them. She must be 30 centimeters taller than she had been before. She stepped forward anyway and embraced Liselle, smelling her hair. It grounded Maddy for a brief moment and she forgot about the monstrosity she’d become. Liselle pulled away first. 

Maddy looked at each person in turn. To Liselle’s credit, she was the only one that didn’t look at Maddy like she was a monster. 

“God damn Sarge, you’re uh,” Gremlin started. “Well, let me just say I’m glad you’re on our side huh? Sheesh.”

Dad reached out and grabbed her arm, “I’m so sorry Maddy. They wouldn’t listen to me. I didn’t want them to do this. You’ll never get away from them now.” Maddy lay her hand that most closely resembled a human one on top of his.

“Did they say if my fucking hair would grow back?” Maddy asked. Liselle gave out a sharp laugh and covered her mouth. 

“I think its cool as fuck!” Gremlin said, “I’m gonna get mine shaved like that too! Maybe do a mohawk, you know. Before the big battle and all!”

Maddy smiled and pulled her friends into a close embrace. She wanted to cry, but couldn’t. 

Being a post-human killing machine came with some odd surprises. For one, people on the ship in space could talk directly into her mind. Jim’s fucking ship could talk into her mind too. And apparently, it was either ordered to be as annoying as possible, or it had some sort of bizarre hatred for peace. 

“The cravings for meat and beans are caused by your hindbrain processing center. It translates the needs of your cybernetic implants into an intuitive form that humans are used to. In this case, you are deficient in iron,” Wraith explained, entirely unprompted.

“Mmhm,” Maddy mumbled, her mouth full of whatever she could find in the one-year emergency stash. One-year is supposedly best practice for colonial critical infrastructure, but Maddy just ate three MRE’s in one sitting. One year seemed a little optimistic.

“Your appetite will decline as your systems finish integrating into your biology.” Wraith said cheerfully. The thing was suspiciously upbeat for a computer. 

“Great,” Maddy said. Swallowing the last bit of a ‘salisbury steak’, whatever the fuck that was. She scooped up the trash and dumped it in a can near the panty door. One of the lab workers gave her a frightened half-smile and looked like he was about to piss himself as Maddy walked by. She snarled at him and got a small rush of endorphins as he flinched. 

“Normally, a Pathfinder Systems Technician would walk you through your new functions, however each existing technician is already bonded to a Pathfinder and there are none available. Jim has tasked me with that role, and I will do my best to introduce you to your new capabilities without it being overwhelming,” the bizarre machine explained. 

“Alright, how about this. Can I make my eyes go normal? Jim did this freaky shit where his pupils could change shape. I want to try ‘normal’,” Maddy said. 

“Yes of course, that’s in your settings menu under optics. Scroll down to ‘external appearance’.” Wraith said. 

“What the fuck do you mean, ‘settings menu’?” Maddy asked. 

“Oh, my apologies. I am new to interfacing directly with a former human and I did not realize you aren’t seeing what I am seeing. Let me enable that feature,” Wraith said. 

Information suddenly appeared in Maddy’s vision. It was similar to the HUD on the scout armor combat helmets, but the detail was absurd. Maddy found that by focusing on any one element, it grew in size. 

“This is so fucking weird,” Maddy said, aloud. 

“What’s weird?” Gremlin asked. Maddy hadn’t noticed she was even there. 

“Oh, this post-human crap. There’s an AI talking in my mind and I can apparently monitor every red blood cell I’ve got at the same time,” Maddy said. “Come here and look at my eyes.” 

Gremlin hopped up and ran over, looking up at Maddy expectantly. Maddy scrolled through the optics menu, passed a bunch of interesting looking things she’d have to revisit later, and selected ‘external appearance’.

“WHOAAAAA,” Gremlin said, in awe. “Do a heart! Whoaaaaa that’s so trippy.” 

Maddy found that once she had it selected, she could change it to whatever she wanted. It was odd, the setting in the optics menu felt a certain way. Like, she could just think about the feeling and it came right up. She didn’t have to scroll around and find it again. She wondered if everything was going to be like that.

“Did you see the armor they sent down with the other stuff yet?” Gremlin asked.

“No, but none of my clothes fit me anymore so a new set of armor seems kind of important,” Maddy said. Her body was a totally different set of dimensions now, everything was too short and too tight. 

“Oh my god, you’re gonna lose it, let’s go,” Gremlin said, leading Maddy out of the pantry and down a hallway. Maddy had to physically slow herself down to avoid running over Gremlin. Her legs were too long. 

Wraith spoke up, and Maddy tried imagining the voice coming through as text instead of words, to make it less invasive. It worked. A chat bubble appeared on the edge of her vision

Wraith: The mark four Pathfinder heavy armor suit was custom assembled for you, Maddy. You may find that the base layer suit is suitable for daily wear, however I recommend against donning the armor until we have fully acquainted you with your current capabilities.

Maddy stood before a rolling rack with a gigantic suit of armor suspended in it. It had to be two and a half or three meters tall- an overlay appeared in Maddy’s vision. 2.5 meters, it read. Just thinking about a measurement made it real. 

“That’s fucking weird,” Maddy mumbled.

“What? It isn’t weird? This thing is way more badass than it should be. Are you even looking at it?” Gremlin asked, annoyed. 

“Yeah, um, sorry. Not the armor. The armor is nuts.” Maddy replied. 

The huge suit of armor looked unreal. It was fully sealed, Maddy could tell that much. Probably hazardous environment rated like the last suit they sent down. Every surface of it was armored, including the face piece of the helmet. It had a humped back with a short antenna sticking out of it. The arms were muscular and huge. The feet were more like hoofs than boots. The armor looked like it could fist fight a tank and win. Maddy had no idea how she was supposed to put it on. 

She spied a small crate at the suits feet and opened it, revealing a vacuum sealed black jumpsuit. Maddy ripped open the package and slid the suit on. It was thick, and not flattering in the slightest, but it fit, and it was comfortable. Maddy looked over and saw Gremlin blushing. 

“Oh shit, sorry,” Maddy said, realizing she’d just flashed her coworker. “It doesn’t feel the same, like, I don’t feel naked.”

“Eh, it’s weird but I’m into it,” Gremlin winked. 

Wraith: Why don’t you feel comfortable with your body?

Maddy: It’s not me. I used to be me and now I’m like, half fucking robot or something. It’s not a human body. Being naked isn’t like a human being naked, it’s like the hood being open on a car.

Wraith was silent for once. 

Maddy discovered that she didn’t need to sleep anymore. Instead, she entered a ‘low-power’ mode that felt like not sleeping for a few hours before standing up and being fully rested. It was very strange and inhuman. Maddy was going to miss sleeping. Using the restroom was weird too, but that was a detail Maddy decided she would try to come to terms with some other day. For now, she did what Wraith said and just looked away. 

Jim didn’t lie when he said Maddy would be stronger and faster than ever. The cybernetics lab didn’t have a gym, but it did have a small physical rehabilitation center. Maddy maxed out the weight on every machine without breaking a sweat. She did pushups nonstop until she got bored and the novelty wore off. She could feel her muscles working, but it the burn wasn’t there. Wraith explained that nanites supplemented her red blood cells and were far more efficient at transporting oxygen to her muscles. Maddy didn’t care particularly about the details, but was surprised when she found she couldn’t actually physically challenge herself, no matter what she tried. 

She also found that she could smell how people were feeling. She could smell stress on them. When she walked by members of the science team or the folks at the lab, she could smell the fear. It was extremely odd, but felt strangely innate. Like she’d adopted a whole new set of senses and they felt just as natural as the ones she’d had before. Bizarrely, she felt that she adapted to her new weirdness very quickly. 

One day, Maddy found Smoker by mistake. He was sitting on a couch in a sort of common area. Maddy approached and saw him cleaning a weapon; she recognized it as Chief’s sidearm. 

“Hey,” she said, sitting down across from him. Smoker looked up at her. He was afraid. His eyes darted from the weapon on the table to Maddy and to a jacket laying next to him. Text appeared in Maddy’s vision, warning her of a potential threat. His fear made a pleasant warmth rise in Maddy that she couldn’t explain.

Smoker swallowed hard, “what do you want?”

“Well, I figured I’d explain why I killed Chief,” she said. Smoker grimaced at the last two words and Maddy’s eyes lit up with delight. 

“Yeah, that was pretty fucked up dude,” Smoker said. 

It was odd, she didn’t know why, but she wanted to fight Smoker. His anger fueled some animalistic urge. It was totally distracting.

“Yeah, it was,” Maddy said, trying to fight down a smile. She wasn’t happy she’d killed Chief, she didn’t even mean to do it. What the fuck was wrong with her? 

“Did you come over here to fucking gloat about it?” Smoker’s face twisted and turned red. He was angry, but too afraid to really act on it. Maddy’s felt her pupils start dancing and changing shapes. She stared at him and he shrunk in his seat. His fear and anger drew an intense predatory pleasure from deep within her hind-brain. She could feel herself grinning with anticipation.

Maddy shook herself out of it and stood up, walking away from Smoker. He pushed out a deep sigh, like he’d been holding his breath as she walked away. She thought she could hear him crying as she rounded the corner. 

Maddy: Wraith, why are my emotions all screwed up? 

Wraith: Please explain.

Maddy: Well, when I feel a negative emotion, it gets like, overruled. And when someone is afraid of me, or like back there with Smoker, he wanted to fight me, and it felt… Good?

Wraith: Interesting. Well, I do know that your reward pathways have been re-written for combat. Your hindbrain suppresses distracting emotion and rewards aggression. The mechanism is designed to suppress aggression towards team members, however. Maybe you don’t see Smoker as a team member?

Maddy: Forget Smoker, you mean I’m being fucking mind controlled?

Wraith: It’s not control, but it is a form of influence. It’s meant to influence you to be a more effective soldier. For instance, you will automatically suppress feelings of fatigue, pain, and fear in combat and instead you will experience rewarding emotions for killing enemy troops or accomplishing tactical objectives. 

Maddy: …I know you’re a machine, but you’ve gotta see how that’s kind of fucked up.

Wraith fell silent again.